Share on Pinterest1. You can tell when you had a manic episode by looking at your credit card bill.Share on Pinterest2. Even though you live on your own, it often feels like you’re waking up with a stranger. Share on Pinterest3. You have so many racing thoughts you should be a NASCAR analyst.Share on Pinterest4. You don’t suffer from a sense of superiority – you’re remarkably modest for an emperor of all humanity. Share on Pinterest5. You just realized people can drink beer for fun, not because they’re self-medicating.Share on Pinterest6. Every morning you wake up thinking, “today is going to be a great day. Just not for me.”Share on Pinterest7. Family members have mistaken you for the Incredible Hulk.Share on Pinterest8. If someone is described to you as “moody” you think to yourself: amateur. Share on Pinterest9. You eat fear for breakfast. Share on Pinterest10. You don’t know the meaning of “psychosomatic,” because you can’t concentrate on reading a word that long.Share on Pinterest11. Your cat would describe you as the aloof and needy one.Share on Pinterest12. Your psychiatrist spends so much time balancing your moods she now has a side job as a professional juggler.Share on Pinterest13. You remember when Prozac was cool. Share on Pinterest14. When you’re down you watch “America’s Most Wanted” and cry out: “Why does nobody want me?” Share on Pinterest15. Your depressive spells make you forgetful, which is a shame because if you thought about your manic stages it might cheer you up. Share on Pinterest16. You wonder how someone who feels so empty can put on so much weight. Share on Pinterest17. When you’re manic, nothing makes you angrier than someone suggesting you’re irritable. Share on Pinterest18. Manic episodes give you a heightened sex drive, which makes it unfortunate you can’t maintain any relationships. Share on Pinterest19. You can’t sleep at nights, which would be OK if you had more insomniacs for friends.Share on Pinterest20. Your depressed self probably wouldn’t be so depressed if your manic self didn’t make so many commitments for it to keep.Share on Pinterest21. If you could cycle as quickly as your moods, you’d be the next Lance Armstrong. Share on Pinterest22. You meet the same person at two different parties and have to convince them you’re not your pain-in-the-ass twin brother. Share on Pinterest23. Friends say you’re the life and soul of the party, but you avoid parties like the plague. Share on Pinterest24. You’ve cried on the pizza delivery guy’s shoulder. Share on Pinterest25. You’ve been told the warranty on your car does not cover existential crisis.Share on Pinterest
